Saying good-bye...

...is the hardest thing to do especially when it's a parent...and that's just what I have to do.

My mom passed away on Friday the 19th at about 4:55 pm. We will be laying her to rest on Saturday the 27th at Queen of Heaven cemetery in Rowland Hills, CA.

She went into a cerebral coma on the Tuesday after she went into the ER due to her liver bleeding way up into her brain and then began having seizures on the left side of her brain so my sister and I had to do the hardest thing we had to do...but that my mom wanted...and that was to "pull the plug" to let her go in peace. We got the family and friends together at the hospital Thursday night so they can say their final words to her and ask for forgiveness if in any way they offended her or anything like that...and Friday morning when my sisters kids came from Arizona and we finally had the courage to take my dad to say good-bye...she left peacefully and without pain. One final seizure took her as she tried gasping for her last breath. We all think she was waiting for my dad to arrive to be able to go home to Jesus. Finally that bad seizure took her once my dad finished speaking to her and took her last breath.

It's so hard to be writing this as you know how happy I was my mom was home after being away from us 2 months...but I'm so much more at peace right now arranging everything that has to be done to send her home. My sis and I just got back from getting her clothing and what not to take to the funeral home...it's still hasn't really sunk in...but I know Friday and Saturday will be the hardest. Just yesterday I went with Oscar to pick out her headstone and sign papers at the cemetery and see her final resting place and I was experiencing a nervous attack on my left side and my face was twitching and my heart was hurting...same side my mom was getting her seizures.

I wont get much more into it so I wont break down crying and get ill...the hardest is yet to come and I need to try and stay strong not only for myself and my kids...but for both my brother and sister who weren't there like I was.

As for my dad...his oldest daughter from his second marriage is taking him to live with her now which is sad he'll be gone...but it's also a GREAT thing she did. Of course when she said it as I was preparing my mom's clothes...it hit me hard and I started crying and what not because first I lost my mom and now my dad? ...but after some realization and not to mention calmed nerves...I knew it was the best not only for him...but for me as well. Now I can take care of ME and my kids and DH like I should be.

So until I can once again bring myself to stamping and what not...I'll be gone. Right now I need some rest so my body and mind can come together because my mind is far behind my body. I pray to God for the strength I need to help me get through all of this. My main thought right now is moving out of this house because the painful memories are everywhere. One day at a time though...one day at a time...



No posts until further notice

Hello dear friends...looks like I wont be posting until further notice. Things have just taken a turn for I don't want to say worst...but it's not the best. My mom had to be rushed to the ER yesterday morning because she started vomiting blood. She has a history of cirrhosis and anemia...so the doctor told us to be prepared just in case. Last night I went to see her and she still had a tube through her nose removing the extra blood in her stomach. Just right now they're doing a procedure on her to see exactly where she's bleeding from to see what happens from there. My sister is here from Arizona and finally my brother decided it was time for him to step it up and they're at the hospital. I'm just waiting for the kids to get out of school (I had to miss my DS's graduation from elementary) and then I'm headed back to the hospital. So if it's ok...can you please say a prayer or two for my mom...Gabriela Loza...so that either she gets well and it's nothing serious where it can't be fixed or God decides he wants to take her and not have her suffer? Thank you so much. I'm sorry I also have to put you guys through this...I just feel lonely and don't know who to "talk" to because even talking to my siblings is useless...they just expect me to have to go through this without any support. I'm not as strong as I may sound I am. Ok...off to pick up Oscar from my DS's graduation ceremony and head off to the hospital where most of my relatives are now. God Bless you all and thank you for being there for me.


The last of the caddies...until I make another...lol!

Yes...here is yet another caddy I made for a Twilight series swap I'm in...we're on Eclipse right now! I signed up for both a card spot and an ABAC spot. I was stuck on idea for the ABAC's until I re-read the book again and kinda wished I was being "kidnapped" by Alice and given a mani-pedi! I guess I wanted to do something out of the ordinary...something not expected and so I made these! I wanted to go all out because I doubt I'll be joining anymore swaps even after the ones I'm in are done. I just got myself into something that's taking lots of my time away from crafting and I hope the HO's understand. You can find the tutorial HERE!

I'm a bit stuck on the cards and they're due July 1st...I have the idea and what not...but I can't seem to unstick myself from the blank canvas and come up with a nice LO. Must be that I'm just feeling tired both mentally and physically now. Oh well...I hope I can push them out soon because I have to make 6. YIKES!

Ok...I just escaped to autopilot this post so I apologize my lack of blah blah! :P Maybe it's a rest for ya huh? ;) I'll post again soon...like I said...sporadically! Continued thanks for the kind words! HUGS!!!

Copics used:
CS/DP: BBlack, RHRed, Bright White, C. C. Designs, & Rockabilly DP
Ink: BBlack & Copics
Stamps: BC Dzyns And Then I Said & There She Goes She's A Lady
Embellishments: May Arts double sided satin ribbon
Others: eyelet border punch, scalloped punch, 1 1/4 circle punch, & 1 3/8 circle punch



Welcome home mommy and a quick project!

Yes...my mommy is home and my worries have vanished! Although the work load is to come...that is MINISCULE compared to the worry that even appeared in my worst of nightmares. I know this may sound like exaggeration...but OMG no it's not. I was waking up in the middle of the night just sad and worried if she was being mistreated because she was confused or something...yeah...I'm worrisome like that!

So now that all of that is in the past...it's time to concentrate on what's to come for the near future. THANKS TO GOD and to all your wonderful prayers my mom is safe at home AND confusion free. Looks like they did take care of her UTI with amazing care and I am very thankful for that. I guess it did take me to get all commando on them...lol. Seriously though...I thank each and everyone of you who have been there through and through for both of us with your thoughts and AMAZING prayers. A million prayers back to you all! Of course a BIG cyber hug and kiss as well... She also sends millions of thanks to each and everyone of you!
Now on to what I made for mommy. So as I was anxious last night after cleaning her room and fixing the hospital bed we had for my dad and just tired and sat down and made this cute caddy for her medicine. I bought this template this weekend from Becky at Inking Idaho and had to make it while I waited for the last load of clothing to dry. Check out her AWESOME tutorials and oh so darn cute work! This one caddy I made is a bit bigger than the other caddy/basket I made to hold my Ciao Copics and airbrush cans. Since my mom LOVES sunflowers..I thought I'd try turning these Black-Eyed Susans into sunflowers...lol. I think I achieved it! I also HAD to ink up my new favorite Sprout from TGF...Dahlia! I love this little girl! I also can't get enough of this adorable Sunny Glen DP...so I had to use it again. I threw in her medication to personalize it!

Ok...I'm off because I'm needed! :) <---yeah...that smile says it all without me saying too much!

Copics used:
CS/DP: CChip, SSun, OOlive, Sunny Glen DP, & C. C. Designs white
Ink: BBlack & Copics
Stamps: Dahlia from TGF
Embellishments: Grosgrain ribbon in Olive, CChip, & VVanilla
Others: Black-Eyed Susans dies, Martha Stewart butterfly punch, white gel pen, airbrush machine, & wire



Just when I thought I could once again breathe...

...I run into another wall! You don't have to read...I'm just writing to release myself! However...I know there are my awesome friends out there who do read this and I thank you so much from the bottom of my heart and thank you SO MUCH for your continued friendship in my ups as well as my downs. I wish I can hug each and everyone of you and look you in the eyes to thank you personally to show my gratitude. I will be posting again as I have...just maybe more sporadically as I go to the home and try to seek some answers.

As this saying goes..."Be who you say you are.. and say what you feel .. because those that matter, don't mind ... and those that mind, don't matter!"

So yesterday we all went to visit my mom at the convalescent home she's in and here I am rushing to her room to have my little one who's missed her SO MUCH finally see her "tita" and be able to hug her and what not and it took me a bit to see my mom was not my mom...AGAIN!

Let me back up a bit...
so I walk into the room and she's sitting there eating and I yell..."Mami" and she looks up and looks back at the food. So that kind of threw me off and then I grab my little one to give her a kiss and after my little one kissed her...it wasn't the reaction I was expecting...it was as if my mom didn't even miss her. It was just like the good morning kisses they share...not the kiss and hug I expected after not seeing each other in over a month. From then I started to suspect something and so I started talking to her...asking her how she was and what not. Then she starts telling me to call Lupita...a friend we haven't heard of in YEARS who moved to Texas. She started telling me that Lupita picked her up the night before to take her to a party at her house and that she fell there at her house and that's how she ended up in the "hospital". She doesn't even know where she is!!! Let me just tell you...it was 2 hours of torture on all of us seeing her think she was at home...eating popcorn...trying to clean up confetti... I'm sure you get the picture!

I did however ask her if she remembered us and she did...quite well I may add. Oscar even asked her if she knew who he was and she did...first AND last name she said...so then him being funny asked her what kind of beer he drinks and she answered him..."stop being silly...you know I know you drink Bud Light"...we laughed at her response because it was so dead on...lol...but still that worry in me doesn't let my brain rest. It's like a non stop playback of what went on...

I asked the nurse there if he could tell me what was wrong and what kind of medication she's on and he was very rude...he couldn't even look me in the face to tell me that he couldn't talk to me because it was my mom's right!!! I was like BS...she's my mom and I deserve some answers! So I spoke to Social Services and she was MUCH kinder and spoke to me to keep me at ease and that when the doctor is there to see my mom...she'll be sure to be there and ask him my questions. Then she takes us to the nurses station to speak to her nurse...I though OH CRAP...this @$$ again...and yet again he was a turd! She asked him MY questions and when answering...he didn't have the common courtesy to speak to me or even look at me...he had to pass the answers thru her...even she thought it was ridiculous! She said she would speak to him in private and took him away. Turns out he CAN'T tell me anything because my mom signed some papers when she was OK to think for herself that said she was in her right mind to make choices...WHAT??? She NEVER signs anything to where SHE can give her OK...I always make the decisions! Freakin' frustrating! Well...it turns out that since she had a catheter in and was in the hospital for a month that he's sure she caught a UTI and that's causing her delirium.

I'm going Monday to have a meeting with the doctor who's gonna be there and I'm making my list of questions because I wanna know...that if Medical & Medicare are gonna be paying $5,000 for the month she's suppose to be in there...that they're doing SOMETHING to earn that money. In all that time we were there...none came in to check on her or change her diaper. When we left though I told the nurse to please check her diaper and that if she has a UTI...that she needs more attention to that. I was OK to see that was done...but after I told them to. I'm gonna have to order some tests be done on her...even if I HAVE to pay extra for it or get the dirty looks from the nurses...but I'm gonna make sure my mom isn't driven to delirium and is able to get the HELL out of there safe and sound.

It's no wonder I don't like those places...I never have and NEVER will. I don't care if it costs me my sanity...but I'm gonna have to be there until their last days of life. Seeing those poor old people lined up against the walls just sitting there like zombies on wheelchairs really freaked me out! The video I saw of that place is NOTHING like what I saw for myself. I may even have to report it because the restroom in my moms room was dirty and didn't smell sanitary. GOD I wish I was rich to have someone come to the house to care for her in the condition she is right now. Then maybe I'd know for sure she was on her way to recovery and could see the chances myself. Hopefully I'm just getting ahead of myself and she does a turnaround and is at least able to communicate in a sound mind. But in the meantime...this poor folk will have to put up to a point in how her care is given.

THANK YOU SO MUCH for your patience with me and most of all...for being there. May our Lord bless you and yours every single day and keep you under constant love and care.


Bombshell Jewelry

Hi ya'll...before I go off to see mom I wanted to leave you with this! I know you'll want to make your own...so keep on reading!

The adorable Miss Nicole Maki who is also a Bombshell made this awesome tutorial on how to make punk pins using those reading glasses you can find at the dollar store. So since I couldn't get out to buy some...yet...I broke out my microscope slides and took her tutorial a step further and made this pendant! How cute are these for presents? I only made one because I'm kinda pressed for time...but I plan on making more as gifts! Give them a try...I would love to see what you make! If you do make some of Nicole's punk pins...make sure to stop by her blog and let her know you made some! I'm sure she'll be pleased!

You can also make magnets! ;)

Copics used:




Are you a Twi-hard? Do you have one of these? If not...YOU JEALOUS? LOL! So I get todays mail and look at what an AWESOME bud of mine sent me! Yup...straight from Volterra, Italy! Home of the Volturi! Oooohhhh...you scared? LOL! I can hide behind Edward...so I'm not worried! Anywho...I just wanted to share that! I'm super excited I got it! THANK YOU SO MUCH TIA!!! Love ya babe!

Oh...and guess what I heard...Tia talked to Edward/Robert about "circus se*"...the expression on his face was priceless! LMAO!!! Sorry...it's an Eclipse (Twilight series) swap thing! *wink*


I'm like laughing my @$$ off at this! So I go to my Twitter to follow someone and I see Joe Jonas is a trending topic...who's Joe Jonas...well...he's LV's "future husband" according to her who is a Jonas Brother. You who know me know LV is a HUGE Jonas Brothers fan and she had been waiting for this so called "Ladies Dance" Joe was gonna preform. So since curiosity killed the cat...I clicked to see what the Joe Jonas hooplah was about...well...I'm like WOOOOOW! Check this out! *shakes head in shame?*

Bombshell Challenge...it's a bit sketchy! :P

Ok you out there...yes YOU! I have a challenge for you! So I've been gone for maybe a bit too long...but now that things are looking up...I can post this! I've been wanting to have a sketch challenge and now is the time! So I'll give you until June 21st to make a card using the sketch provided! My DD will pick a card at random and I will give you a little pressy...a Bombshell Stamps set of your choice! *wink* So whatcha waiting for? Let's get to it! I provided a card as a sample!

A few things to mention...if you're not a member yet of Bombshell Stamps at Paper Craft Planet (PCP sounds a bit too junkie...lol)...go sign up and let Shannon know Gabby sent ya! Then once you're registered you can be part of the challenge!
You MUST use Bombshell Stamps...so if you don't have any...here's your chance to buy that one (or two) set you've been eyeing!
ANY theme or color combo is fine...just keep the sketch as is! A bit tweeking is OK!

When you make your card...upload it to the gallery at PCP with the key-code BSSC1 and post a reply to the challenge section I opened...that way I can gather them all and wont have to go searching. You can also post it on your blog (but it MUST be posted to the BSS@PCP gallery as well) just make sure you link this challenge AND Bombshell Stamps @ PCP.
I probably explained this as clear as mudd...and if I did and you're unsure of something...please ask!

Copics used for the card:


I was experimenting...lol...don't laugh!

LV's dream is to one day create digi stamps under her name...so today just for fun I decided to test out something I found online on how to digi. Well the first try was a FAIL! The digi didn't turn out quite how I had envisioned it. This is what it looked like! Oh...I had to play with one of my favorite pics of LV.

So then I decided I would trace the image instead and then this came out a bit better...lol.

Then I took it a step further and colored it in using PSP...lol...not the best coloring...but I'm still learning how to color using PSP. So I was bored...lol...sue me...lol! :P

WOO HOO...I got to complete a project!!! *insert HUGE smile here*

So last night before I went to bed...I did a little blog surfing! Since my computer was running slow...I only got to make it to a few. I don't know why I'm having a hard time getting to some blogs. GRRR! Anywho...as I was blurfing I decided I'd pay Angie a visit and fell in love with some CUTE baskets she made and told her..."I'm gonna copy you!!!" and I did! Neener Neener Angie...I told you so!

Tongue Out

You can check out her CUUUUTE baskets here! I told ya...cute huh? So I had to try my own and being that I am IN LOVE with the new DP over at The Greeting Farm I used THAT along with one of the Hope & Grace cuties. I even broke out the good paper to color...lol. Yes...I bought some AWESOME I DON'T KNOW HOW I LIVED WITHOUT IT CARDSTOCK from All That Scraps from C. C. Designs that's Copic AND Prisma quality!!! I am in coloring heaven! I swore by my Wausau Bright White...I must say...I swore by the wrong paper.

Shy Whistler
So now with the awesome CS and the oh so fun DP...I made this basket! Thanks for inspiring Angie...and thanks to the one who came up with the tutorial which you can find here. I'm gonna have to make more when I have more time! Right now this one holds my airbrush cans and the Riley Copic set I picked up at Hanna Stamps! Ahhh...I also did a bit of piecing in there!
Winky 2

Copics used:
CS/DP: Kraft, Sunny Glen DP, CChip, & C. C. Designs
Ink: BBlack & Copics
Stamps: Hope & Grace
Embellishments: leaf dies, flower dies, flower center die/punch, & CChip grosgrain ribbon
Others: corner rounder, eyelet border punch, 1 3/8, & 1 1/4 punches


My desk re-arranged!

I have a MAJOR headache this morning...so I wont type much so I can rest it off by going back to sleep so I'll share pictures of what my desk looks like now. I hope I can post something later on if not I'll post something totes rad tomorrow that I'm sure will be worth the wait! Thanks ya'll...and thanks for looking!
Before...After...and After with Bubba looking for the stamps and the catnip! Notice how the before is like really neat...then the after...LMBO! It's called creative mess!



Looks like a trend now...

...so I'm knocking on wood!

Hey there and good morning! Wow...I can't believe it's already June...the smack dab in the middle of the year! I know where most of my half year has gone...do you? Anywho...I wanted to show you a couple cards today of stuff I made while MIA...I'm still working on some new stuff and hope to update real soon on the newer stuff! Expect Bombshells! *wink* Today's cards were made for my friends Cheryl aka DJ Cher for a Riley/Sophie swap. As you can tell...the cards were when I was at my mad woman peek because they honestly do not reflect my style. Still...I couldn't back down from the swap...I can't do that to a HO...especially my sweet Deej! LOL! BTW...I am SOOOO jealous of her! Guess who she got to meet AND STAMP WITH??? None other than Miss Hanna STamps herself...Kristi!!! SHUT UP RIGHT??? Check out her blog header! Jealous much? YES PLEASE!

Ok so this first card is Sophie Ballerina. I saw a card on SCS (I'm sorry I forgot who...but I'll search to credit...but I'm sure it was Jeanne) that had a banner and so I had to copy the idea! I was in a dire loss of my muse...so I had to "copy" from somewhere just to pull out the cards. She was colored using Hanna Stamps Riley Copic set. I hope she wasn't too blah...like in simple blah!

Copics used:
C3 & RV11
CS/DP: PPirrouette, CChip, & Bright White
Ink: BBlack & Copics
Stamps: Ballet Sophie
Embellishments: flat back pearls
Others: Giga scalloped punch, Mega circle punch, SU scalloped punch, 1 3/8 punch, 1 1/4 punch, & piercing tool

Now comes Sleepy Time Riley! I had initially chosen Sleepy Time Riley because I wanted to use my Glow In The Dark paint...but OMG I could not get it right to fit into those small moons for the life of me!!! This card was also a copy (or CASE) only I flipped it. This is the card I CASED. Once again...not one of my favorite work...but I had to pull them thru so I wouldn't fail! This is also for DJ's swap. I used Copics on him too...only I didn't take a picture of those! YIKES! Distraction takes over my brain sometimes! So...whatcha think? Be brutaly honest...lol.

CS/DP: CChip, BBlue, Bright White, & unknown DP vendor
Ink: BBlack & Copics
Stamps: Sleepy Time Riley
Embellishments: brads
Others: crimper & piercing tool